IS IT WRONG FOR A CHRISTIAN HUSBAND & WIFE TO ATTEND SEPERATE CHURCHES?
This particular Question keep coming to my mined since two weeks ago and I am led by the Holy spirit to give detail light to this issue so we can all be enlightend especially for all the Christian members all over the world.
A husband and a wife attending separate churches is a situation that is more common than one might think. It’s also possible for the children of such couple to be divided, but the other way round there is nothing bad in that for the both to attend different church if ( THE CHURCH REPRESENT THE BODY OF CHRIST WELL) in following the true teaching of Jesus Christ as one body in God, to me and to my best knowledge the problem is not the couple but ( THE CHURCH), between the two churches, thereby creating a rift in the family that is never healthy. In order to determine whether or not it is “wrong” for a husband and wife to attend separate churches, we must first look at marriage as a relationship instituted by God, but before then let’s look from this angle from our culture who is the real owner of religion ( MAN OR WOMAN)?
Bible make it clear, our own culture make it clear and all other Holy book made it clear that man is the head of family ,in 1 Corinthians 13;35 King James Version
And if they want to learn something, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is shameful for a women to speak in church. Though in this case according to the Bible vs who is the owner of a church in marriage??
Genesis 2:24 tells us God created man and woman to become “one flesh” when they marry as one join body, not two separate beings who go their own separate ways. There is a unity in marriage that is unique and holy. Moreover, marriage is the picture of Christ and His church (believers) as described in Ephesians 5:31-32. The marriage covenant between a man and a woman is symbolic of the covenant between Christ and those for whom He died. His is an everlasting covenant and one that is holy and sacred, just as marriage is to be holy, sacred and unbroken. But as for we the so call church leaders are the major problem because of (SELFISH INTEREST) .
This unity of two people into one reaches its most sacred in the spiritual realm, where the two are to be of one mind regarding the basic doctrines of Christianity – God, Christ, sin, salvation, heaven/hell, etc. This unity of understanding through the ministry of the Holy Spirit unites a husband and wife in a bond unlike any other on earth. But the problem here is the church I mean all Christian Church because we have fail to see ourselves as one body in (CHRIST JESUS) so pls now tell me how is not so easy for marriage couple not to go different best way,
While it’s possible for a husband and wife to have differing tastes as far as music, preaching or worship styles, children’s programs, etc., none of these things are significant enough to break up the family into two parts so they can attend different churches based on tastes. It is clear that if both churches are Bible-based and Christ-honoring, there is no reason why one spouse can’t bend a little and put his/her personal preferences aside. An even better alternative is for the couple to join together to seek a church where the Word of God is preached as the only guide for faith and practice, where the entire family can learn the true gospel of Jesus Christ, and where the family can fellowship with like-minded believers. In this, the husband, as the spiritual head of the family, should take the lead and make the final decision, lovingly taking his wife’s input into consideration.
Sadly, the two-church family most often crops up in marriages where one spouse was raised Roman Catholic and the other was raised in a Protestant denomination. In situations such as these, it would have been wise for the couple not to marry. Please I didn’t say those who marry from different denomination won’t have successful marriage but I am saying they may have doctrinal clashes which will need understanding and patience alot.
Should Christians of different denominations date or marry? I advise you marry from your denomination. I keep telling C & S members to marry from C & S church and those from other denomination marry from their denomination except God lead you otherwise but in most cases of God will use you in that fold , He will find a spouse for you in same fold . That’s how it is throughout scripture! Abraham married from his own people, He married wife for isaac from his town and also Isaac direct Jacob where to get wife , his people again.
God doesn’t choose for everyone. He only choose for those carrying blessing for their generation. Isaac didn’t bother about who Esau will marry but concerned about Jacob because he carries the blessing for generation.
You may ask, what of those that have married from different denomination? should they seperate or divorce ? Ha NO No No
If a marriage has already taken place, the couple should strive for spiritual unity. Two people entrenched in their different doctrinal positions often find it very difficult to compromise and reconcile, but with God, all things are possible. A couple in such a situation may be forced to attend different churches, especially if one or both spouses consider the other spouse’s beliefs to be unbiblical. In such a situation, both spouses should commit to praying that truth be revealed and spiritual unity be achieved.
These doctrinal conflicts must be resolved in a family of Christianinty because the problem if separation dowel among us too much and is affecting our life in a different way, for example I have seen a lady telling her husband to be that her pastor says they are not compatible because the in question he attending White garment church now in this type of situation where is the unity of Christ here??.
before true unity can be achieved. A couple attending different churches must be willing to hold everything they are taught up to the light of Scripture and be ready to discard anything that is contradicted by the Bible. They must “test all things and hold fast to that which is true” (1 Thessalonians 5:21).
Now for all the while garment members attending different
Christian church, I am not talking about this type. it’s fine and okay. wife may have Assignment in a branch and the husband in another but their name must be registered under one church as full member and as a couple. So is other denomination. like in winners , we have different branches but it’s very advisable for couples to attend same church branch but of the of situation where the man or woman was transfer to another state because of his or her job and your family church is even in the environment or the place is too far, here I qoute that once you are Christian you are a member of all church.
Most couples, if they’re seeking to please God, do eventually find a church where both spouses are satisfied.
When you’re newly married, and all is sweetness and light, it seems easy to overlook differences of preference—which restaurant to go to, what TV show to watch, where to go on summer vacation—in order to please your spouse. This time of agreement often extends to your choice of what church to attend.
As you settle into your relationship, however, feelings about some preferences gain importance.
For many couples, the birth of their first child seems to trigger a closer look at the church or faith tradition in which they want their children to be reared. Differences of opinion about what church to attend become more intense when the debate centers not just on varying worship styles but also on differences in deeply held doctrines and worldviews—even if those differences never had seemed all that serious before.
Frequently spouses discover a desire to return to the traditions in which they were raised. Or they want just the opposite—avoiding reminders of unhappy religious experiences in their own childhoods, against which they rebelled.
Principles for Selecting a Church
Here are a few principles you might want to consider—especially if you and your spouse are having trouble in this area.
Husbands have a spiritual leadership role—within limits. Generally, the biblical standard is that the husband has a responsibility to lead spiritually at home. Whenever possible, the wife is to respect and follow that leadership rather than openly rebelling against it or passively undercutting his efforts. The husband also is to love his wife “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). He has a sacred duty not to trample on or ignore his wife’s needs, preferences, and feelings. If a husband is “leading” his wife and family into churches or practices that are heretical or cultic, of course, the wife has to put her spiritual foot down and refuse to participate. Her first allegiance is to God and His truth. Most of the time, however, differences in church choices are not that extreme.
Give your relationship priority. God doesn’t want a dispute over church choice to tear your marriage apart. Try to compromise in a way that both of you can live with. Perhaps you’ve considered only a few churches, and there are more you can visit. Keep looking for a place of worship that provides for the spiritual growth of both spouses—and your children, if you have any. Expect that if you’re both seeking what God wants, have a spirit of unselfishness, and genuinely wish to serve the needs of your spouse rather than your own needs first, God will lead you to a good solution.
Some husbands and wives decide to “solve” the problem by skipping church altogether. Clearly this is not a decision God would want for them; Scripture states that Christians are not to abandon fellowship with other believers (Hebrews 10:25).
If you’re at an impasse on this issue, don’t despair. Keep praying with each other that God will give you a solution. Examine your own motives, asking yourself why you find it so hard to accommodate your spouse. You may discover that this argument is a symptom of deeper problems in your relationship—control needs, conflict management, or plain old selfishness. Address these issues—in Christian marriage counseling, if necessary.
Most couples, if they’re seeking to please God and not just themselves, do eventually find a church where both spouses are satisfied……part one pls watch out for part two.